Hyphenated-Homestead

I recently came across this phrase—originally used to describe banking giants during the 2008 financial collapse:
“Too big to fail. Too big to nail. Too big to jail.”

Catchy, right? Almost absurd in its rhythm—and yet… painfully true.

It got me thinking:
What if we all have our own internal versions of these “too big” boulders?

Not financial institutions, but mental institutions—the kind that govern our time, energy, and choices.

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The Invisible Boulders

We all have ideas or roles or identities that feel untouchable:

• That project you’re leading that’s gone off track but feels too big to fail.
• That team process you secretly can’t stand but don’t dare question—too big to nail.
• That dysfunctional workplace dynamic that’s become so normalized it’s practically immune to accountability—too big to jail.

Sound familiar?

• The problem with these mental boulders is that they become self-imposed limitations.
• We don’t challenge them because they’ve been around too long, or they serve some outdated identity, or
• We’ve just accepted them as “how things are.”

And suddenly, we find ourselves tiptoeing around them, adjusting our behavior, protecting them from scrutiny—when we should be evaluating, evolving, or even evicting them.

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A Real-Life Glitch

A few years ago, I was brought into a project that had already been rolling for months. Deadlines missed, goals blurry, team morale low.

But the kicker? No one questioned the process.
Because the project lead was a senior leader. Because the system had already cost six figures. Because it was “too far along.”

Too big to fail.
Too big to nail.
Too big to jail.

And so, we kept going… until we didn’t.

Eventually, someone brave (not me… at first 😬) asked the right questions. We pivoted, streamlined, and re-scoped. And the best part? The sky didn’t fall. In fact, people exhaled.

We forget that honesty, when paired with kindness, doesn’t break things. It can actually save them.

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Your Turn

Here’s a coaching challenge I’d offer through mPath Services:

• What’s your version of “too big to fail”? A goal, role, or habit that needs reevaluation.
• What belief or dynamic do you tiptoe around because it feels “too big to nail”?
• What situation in your life has become immune to accountability—“too big to jail”—and needs some healthy truth?

Sometimes, we stay loyal to an old version of success just because it’s familiar. But growth often begins with small revolutions—asking hard questions, letting go of broken things, and realizing that nothing is too big to be rethought.

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If this phrase made you pause, good.
If it made you squirm a little, even better.
That means it’s knocking on the door of something that might need your attention.

Let’s not be afraid to audit our mental banks every now and then.

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